Marilyn Hallett on a death-do-us-part relationship, backpacking and her happy place

The founder of a successful digital media platform for South African 60-plussers writes about a recipe for a wonderful career, praying her way through slumps, and the enchantment of the bush.

1 Which childhood memories are dear to you?

My parents died very young, in their 50’s.  My father first, very unexpectedly, from an asthma attack which led to a sudden heart attack.  It was a huge shock for my mother and I (my sister was away, living in Hong Kong).  I always said my mother died of a broken heart – she couldn’t handle the grief.  She and my father were so close and in love, and a part of her died when he died.  

The doctors will say she died from bowel cancer which progressed quickly to the liver.  So my childhood memories are very special and close to my heart.  My parents were the best ever – they had our best interests at heart, they were fun, they were incredibly sociable, they were adventurous, my friends often came to visit them when I was away travelling either in Rhodesia/now Zimbabwe, or off on my backpack travels in the East – from Australia right up to Hong Kong, overland. My father was in the British Army, and therefore we often travelled. 

My younger years were spent in Nairobi, Kenya – for seven years.  My Dad used to take us on safari throughout East Africa, when we visited many different game reserves.   I think that is where I must have got my absolutely love for the bush.  My Dad and I used to get up early most Sunday mornings and go to the Nairobi National Park and spend a couple of hours there.  My mother and sister joined us occasionally – it wasn’t their thing as much as it was ours.  Family and friends were important to us all, and still is – events like the regular Sunday lunches knowing that we could invite friends whenever we liked (advance notice needed of course!), the Christmases that were chock-a-block with friends, especially those that had no family around, the family reunions with family in the UK and Israel. And so much more…

2 Where did you meet your husband?

After my father died, my mother insisted that I carry on with a broadcasting course that I was doing at the time – she said my life must continue.  I met Rob, my husband, who was the friend of people who were on the broadcasting course with me.  He met me at a very sad time of my life, because my mother became ill soon afterwards.  Rob was a pillar of support to me while my mother was ill and I’m glad he had the opportunity to get to know her, even though she was a fraction of her true self.

Image: Pexels

3 In your experience, what contributes to a long and happy marriage?

Rob and I have been married for nearly 44 years.  We’ve had amazing times together, but we’ve also weathered the hard times and the storms, we have argued, we annoy each other, but somehow we get through all that, have grown to understand our strengths and weaknesses and have a realistic view of that.  We complement each other, and throughout the years, we have followed our own interests, but also have many common interests.   Our family are hugely important to us, as are our good friends.  Most definitely, a “death do us part” relationship. 

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4 You’re a grandmother (lucky you!) Tell us about your grandkids and what is special about each of them.

We absolutely adore our grandchildren.  Sadly, two live in Amsterdam, but as family relationships are important to us, we have seen a fair bit of them even though they are still very small. 

We have one grandson in Cape Town – Ethan, who is nearly 7.  He and Grandpa are “best friends”, he tires us out, he comes up with things way beyond his years, and we love him to bits. 

Little Robbie (yup, he has his grandpa’s name) is nearly 5 and is being brought up to speak English, German, Dutch and he’s learnt a little Spanish from a school friend.  So proud of our little grandson who can speak three and a bit languages.  He’s as bright as a button, completely adorable and we love spending time with him and chatting via video link on WhatsApp. 

And then there is Sophia Marie!  Well, this little treasure has crept into our hearts and even though she’s only just turned 2, she is as cute as they come, oozes personality, and like her brother, is a bright little spark.  All, our little treasures, all special in their own individual ways.

Here Marilyn discusses the challenges – and potential! – of 60-plussers.

5 You spent 30 years in the field of academic recruitment. How did this period enrich you?

I spent most of my working life at the University of Cape Town – 30 years.  UCT was very good to me, but then again, I was very good to UCT.  I believe I was lucky enough to work there in the “good old days” – colleagues became family, and we were blessed to have an excellent working environment.  I spent many, many hours in selection committees, with some of the best minds in the world, and I learnt so much from my learned colleagues across the university in the varying faculties and departments.  I worked with professors, deputy vice-chancellors, heads of department and all levels of administrative staff. I was lucky enough to be utilising my research and writing skills (one of my passions in life), and meeting people from all over the world.  A hugely enriching experience, a job I absolutely loved, and colleagues who were such good friends.  A recipe for a wonderful career.  I was very lucky and enormously blessed. 

Image: Pexels

6 In our podcast episode you tell the story of how you started You’ve Earned It. What inspired you to keep on expanding this platform in the face of many challenges?

I remember one of my UCT colleagues saying to me one day, a couple of years after I had started You’ve Earned It/YEI.  He said “you were so brave to leave UCT, and start your own business”.   I had never really thought about being “brave”, but thought well maybe I was or else I was (excuse the language!) – bloody stupid.  YEI was something completely unexpected and unplanned.  It found its way into my heart and I couldn’t leave it alone – I was like a dog with a bone.  I needed to take this “thing” as far as I could.  I never anticipated starting a business (I had no business skills!), never mind taking it on a now 11 year journey.  I found my “purpose”, I was doing something I loved.   I exceeded my own expectations, I had many accomplishments, I have reached significant milestones.  However, there have been down times too.  We’ve encountered many slumps along the way, the kind of slumps that make you wonder if you had made the right decision, but I have prayed my way through these slumps and worked extraordinarily hard, harder than I ever worked before and I thought I had a tough job at UCT.  I feel as though I have been brought on this journey, and I need to keep at it, until a logical end.

7 Do you have any advice for first-time entrepreneurs?

Don’t be afraid.  Look for your passion and purpose in life and utilise your experience, your skills, your knowledge, your wisdom.  What you don’t know, learn.  I landed up going to a business coach, because I have simply never run my own business before, and here I was, doing everything from A to Z.  Google became my best friend and I soaked up learning from wherever I could do.  The business coach was a good move, because I realised that one of the big lessons you  have to learn is to become a salesman.  If you can’t sell your product, who’s going to buy it?  And you can’t buy in skills that you don’t have, until the business is sustainable. 

Image: Unsplash

8 Please describe one of your “favourite-est” places.

The bush, the bush, and the bush.  LOVE game reserves – they are my happy place.  Having said that, we love road trips, love travelling and pre-covid we embarked on wedding destinations – not ours!  But the children of friends. 

We travelled to France for a wedding, and to China.  Cost us an arm and a leg, but we wouldn’t change a thing.  China was completely amazing – I have always loved the East and Asia.  But then again, France was amazing too – steeped in European history and the polar opposite of China. 

I have done game reserves in East Africa, and fairly recently, the Masai Mara, we have done game reserves in Namibia and throughout South Africa, but probably the “favourite-est” place is the Kruger Park.  We are longing to go back and feel that love for Africa.

About Marilyn

Marilyn Hallett is the founder of You’ve Earned It, or commonly known as YEI.  YEI is the digital media platform for South African 60-plussers.  YEI features relevant, on-point, informative and interesting articles geared at this age group, and also showcases discounts, savings and benefits for SA retirees, seniors, pensioners and baby boomers.  YEI has been online for 11 years and was preceded by the YEI book published by Juta’s in 2008.  Previously, Marilyn spent 30 years working in academic recruitment at the University of Cape Town.

YEI platform: You’ve Earned It – the digital media platform for SA 60-plussers

Website:  http://youve-earned-it.co.za

Newsletters:  http://youve-earned-it.co.za/e-newsletters/ 

YEI Facebook page:   https://www.facebook.com/youveearnedit

Sign up on a YEI WhatsApp group:  https://youve-earned-it.co.za/join-a-yei-whatsapp-group/

Photograph of Marilyn Hallett: supplied

Thumbnail image: Unsplash